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Renaming Every College Football Team

A while back, We did a bit on the cancel culture’s attack on College football nicknames.  It’s not just the Native American teams, it’s any team that anyone anywhere might be offended by; it’s mostly nonsense.  Click here to read more, or there will be another link at the bottom.

The Most Offensive Team Nicknames

As we did so, we wondered what other teams on the chopping block might change their name to… or, as in the case of the Washington Football Team, not change.  And in truth, a bit of change is needed in the FBS world.  It’s boring.  It seems like half the teams are the Tigers, Bulldogs, Wildcats, or Owls.  And half the teams names make no sense at all.  Elephants and Kangaroos in Ohio and Alabama.  It’s confusing.

So we just said to h@ll with it and renamed all of them.  Did a bit of research, tried to make the names unique… and relevant to the team.  We broke down the why for each one.  Let us know what you thought, and if you have a better idea… let us know that, too… we’ll change ours if they suck.

Air Force Aviators

The bird reference is obvious, but it’s always seemed like the Air Force Falcons should have a name more suited for what they do. “Aviators” is perfect.

Akron Summits

The name Akron came from a Greek word meaning “an elevation” or “point.” Summit is the top of a mountain… can’t get any more elevated than that with your feet on the ground.

Alabama Black Warriors

“Crimson Tide ” is an iconic name in football, and their elephant logo nearly as much. But like Akron has no kangaroos… not a lot of elephants in Alabama. The Tuscaloosa river, which “Bama’s home town is named after, translates loosely to “Black Warrior”

Appalachian State Explorers

App State is located in the city of Boone, named after Daniel Boone, who more than anything was known as an explorer.

Arizona Desert Swarm

One of 7 million different teams called the Wildcats, Arizona needed a new name. We stole this one… it was the nickname of their defensive unit at one time. It was amazing then and still is.

Arizona State Canyons

You think Arizona, you think the Grand Canyon. Seems like someone would have named a team after a major landmark by now, anyway.

Arkansas Ozarks

The campus is in the Ozark mountain range. Is it as cool as Razorbacks? Of course not. One of the teams in college football that really got the name riight. But changes all oround.

Arkansas State Archers

Sorry, ASU. They did change their name recently… they were the Indians. But we’re changing every name here. Arkansas is the world’s biggest producer of Archery stuff… Bows and arrows and the like, and is called the “Archery capital of the world.

Army War Angels

A War Angel is a fierce warrior who shows absolutely no fear, no matter who the opponent is or how many opponents there are. Great name for our cadets.

Auburn War Eagles

Who decided “Tigers” Is Better Than “War Eagle”, anyway?

Ball State Bob Rosses

We literally couldn’t find much of anything of note about Ball State, or it’s home… Muncie, Indiana.  We did, however, discover that Bob Ross lived and filmed his show there.  That’s good enough for me.

Baylor Mammoths

Baylor is in Waco, home of Mammoth National Monument… and Mammoths is a cool name.

Boise State Blue Turfs

“Broncos” is another pretty generic name. Boise Stael, by it’s own doing, is known for one thing more than any other… that blue field.

Boston College Revolution

Boston was the birthplace of the American Revolution.

Bowling Green Cavers

Bowling Green, Kentucky , is known for some of the coolest cave systems in the country, and a frewuent destination for spelunkers.

Buffalo Steel

The Bulls nickname has always been a pretty obvious play on the Buffalo Bills. The steel indusrty is big in Buffalo, so we wanted to use a name referencing it without just stealing “Steelers” No need to make it complicated… “Buffalo Steel” is a cool d@mn name.

BYU Saints

I know they’re not all Mormons, but that’s what you think of when you think BYU. Mormons are also called “Latter Day Saints”. Thus… the BYU Saints.

California Golden Oskis

Oski is actually the Golden Bears’ mascot’s name. Keeps the tradition without being one of a million teams called the “Bears”

Central Michigan Astronomers

The school’s astronomy program is renowned; they even have their own observatory.

Charlotte Racers

Charlotte is a hub of the NASCAR world; the hall of fame is there.

Cincinnati 68ers

The U of C was originally a medical school, and was known for training combat medics during WWI, WWII, and Korea.  The term for those Docs was 68W’s, or 68 Whiskeys… thus, the 68ers.

Clemson Rangers

Clemson is a school with military roots… the name “Rangers” pops up frequently over history, including an ROTC affiliated group that exists today.

Coastal Carolina Aces

Coastal Carolina is in Myrtle Beach, the self proclaimed golf capital of the world.  Anyone who plays golf knows an “Ace” is a hole in one… the holy grail in golf.  And so… the Aces.

Colorado Highlanders

The stadium is a mile above sea level. And Highlanders is just a really cool name.

Colorado State Bighorns

Same animal, just a name that isn’t shared by about 3,000 other teams.

Duke Sawbones

Durham, the city where Duke is located, is known as the “City Of Medicine” “Sawbones” is a cooler name for a doctor.

East Carolina Toppers

The tobacco business is huge in Greenville, where ECU is located.  “Toppers” are the folks who remove the bud from the plant upon harvest. 

Eastern Michigan Hackees

The EMU campus is famous for it’s massive squirrel population. A “Hackee” is a squirrel indiginous to the area.

FIU Wing Walkers

The campus of FIU was initially built over an old airport, parts of which are still there. So what is a “wing walker”?  You know the guys who walk along side the plane with the orange flashlight batons?  “Wing Walkers”.  And a d@mn cool name for a football team.

Florida Olympians

This is a name Florida has actually earned… as of 2021, University of Florida students and alumni have won 143 Olympic medals, including 69 gold medals

Florida Atlantic Spectrum

FAU is one of the premier electrical spectrum research institutions in the country, primarily in the area of spectral electronics… whatever that is.

Florida State Renegades

You know that eventually the ‘Noles will end up having to change their name, even if the actual Seminoles are support the name. “Renegade” is the Horse that the mascot, Chief Osceola, rides, and a d@mn fine name for a football team.

Fresno State Senators

More state and U.S. Senators have come from Fresno State than any other school.

Georgia Felons

Georgia was founded in 1732 by British Member of Parliament James Oglethorpe as a felon colony. Oglethorpe wanted to use the colony as a place for prisoners who could not pay their debts. The social reformer believed that many debtors were released back into cities without any form of support. He wanted to take these people and give them a second chance in a new place.   Yeah, it’s a brash name. BUt the T shirts… h@ll, the marketing, period… would be incredible.

Georgia Southern Dons

Georgia Southern was, at one point, a school for teachers. A “Don” is a university professor… also a mob boss.  Both make cool football team nicknames.

Georgia State Nighthawks

Bear With us here… Georgia State was founded as a Night school. “Night Owls” was out… we’re looking for At least a bit of originality, and ‘Owls” is one of those names there are already too many of.  “Nighthawk” is another name for one… and a d@mn good name for a football team.

Georgia Tech Ramblin’ Wreck

We broke our rules and recycled an old name here, because it meets both criteria… it’s original and it’s awesome.  Why, with this out there, did they ever decide on Yellow Jackets?

Hawaii Volcanoes

The Island of Hawaaii is actually a volcano. Literally the whole d@mn island.

Houston Apollos

We might have gotten a bit over creative here, but come on.  It’s one of 8,000 teams called the “Cougars”.  They needed some extra.  Why Apollos?  “Houston” was the first word said from the moon to Earth.  Their ship was the Apollo.

Illinois Fighting Railriders

Champaign, Illinois, home of the school, was built as a railroad town.  The ‘Railriders’ was a group of specialized railworkers known for being destructive and unruly who worked out of the new city.

Indiana Conductors

You knew Indiana had to be known for something… It’s d@mn sure not football. Not really basketball since Bobby Knight left.  So we looked beyond sports. Turns out they have an outstanding music school, often called the “Juliard of the Midwest”  And so… the Conductors.

Iowa State Timber Rattlers

A venomous snake that’s common in Iowa. Not sure if that’s an improvement over “Hawkeyes”, but I’m not sure what exactly a “Hawkeye” is.

Iowa Shuckers

Ever been to Iowa? Know what’s there? Corn. Just corn.

Kansas Tornadoes

Ever seen the Wizard Of Oz?

Kansas State Helos

The helicopter was invented in Kansas… “Helo” (Hee-low) in military terms.

Kent State Silver Foxes

We go back in time again… before they were the Golden Flashes, Kent was the Silver Foxes. Much cooler name.

Kentucky Thorobreds

You think Kentucky, you think hose racing.

Liberty Televangelists

The school was founded by Jerry Fallwell, king of the Televangelists.  And run like it since.  The name fits perfectly.

Louisiana Yabbers

We had to stick with the cajun theme… Yabbers are crawdad hunters

ULM Steamboats

ULM just changed their name a few years back,,, and Warhawks is a pretty d@mn good name. But we’re changing everyone, so ULM is now the Steamboaters. The college was renamed in 1819 to honor the arrival of the James Monroe, the first steamboat to ascend the river. We were going to go with Steamboats. Not sure if ‘Steamboaters’ is even a word, but it sounds cooler.

Louisiana Tech Engineers

Not the most original… they have one of the best engineering programs in the country. But it’s more original than the 3 million teams named “Bulldogs”.  Why are Bulldogs so popular?  Great dogs, but there are other cool dogs.

Louisville Warmbloods

Like Kentucky, Louisville gets a racing name. No one thinks of Cardinals or Wildcats when they think of Kentucky. A Warmblood is a type of bred horse.

LSU Bayou Bengals

As with Auburn, we didn’t really have to look here.  LSU has an amazing name sitting around that they aren’t even using.

Marshall Mountain Warriors

I’ve never understood why Marshall is the Herd, with a buffalo for a mascot.  Not a lot of buffaloes in West Virginia?  Mountains.  Like all of them.  We’re not sure if a mountain warrior is an actual thing, but it should be.

Maryland Old Liners

The “Old Line” nickname was given during the Revolutionary War, when 400 soldiers in the First Maryland Regiment fought a British force of 10,000 and helped General George Washington’s army to escape.  Sounds like a d@mned good name to find inspiration in.

Memphis Blues

So you’re naming the teams at a University in a city that has literally the best music pedigree in the history of people… literally everything you hear on the radio was invented here… all of it… and you name your team… the Tigers.  Yeah.  The city is literally called “The Birthplace of blues”.  You wear blue.  D@mn.

Miami (FL) Night Scene

It is what Miami is known for, right?  And again… imagine the merch.  And the uniforms.

Miami (OH) Legacy

Quite a few of the biggest fraternities in the country were created at this school.  Legacy was pretty much the coolest sounding frat term we found.

Michigan Leaders

It’s a bit cheesy at first glance, but Ann Arbor is known as “Home of Leaders and Best.”

Michigan State Bullwhackers

Spartans may be one of the most overused of mascots, but there’s a reason.  Spartans were bad @ss.  But so were the Bullwhackers, the forerunners of the Teamsters, who played a major role in the development of East Lansing.

Middle Tennessee Colonels

Murfreesborough, the city where MTSU resides, in named after  Revolutionary War hero Colonel Hardy Murfree.

Minnesota Golden Lakers

Ever wonder why the LA Lakers are called what they are?  They started in Minnesota.  And Minnesota has a whole d@mn lot of lakes.  They’re everywhere.  In the name of Minnesota, we’re taking the name back.

Mississippi State Cowbells

Maybe the easiest one we did here…. ever seen a Mississippi State home game? They ring these bells constantly… tens of thousands of them.

Missouri Tigers

In 1862, the American Civil War forced the university to close for much of the year. Residents of Columbia formed a Union “home guard” militia that became known as the “Fighting Tigers of Columbia”. They were given the name for their readiness to protect the city and university. In 1890, the university’s newly formed football team took the name the “Tigers” after the Civil War militia. These Tigers keep their name.

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